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It’s the Vibrating Rabbit: The Jackrabbit Stampede

September 9, 2006
Forney, TX
Riders: GingerClip Distance: 38 miles

Everything started out with such promise. Parking was a snap – with only about 200 or so riders there was plenty of space in the high school parking lot. There wasn’t a line for registration, and the T-shirt was cute, even if it was white. There were some little touches that really take a ride up a notch: there was great music being piped into the parking lot, a raffle for a free Cannondale, a Specialized truck offering tune ups, and prize money for the first rider in each distance. I was ready to be wowed. Unfortunately, that’s where it ended.

(Jen, Donna, Dawn, GingerClip)

The instant we hit the start line it was chip/seal, chip/seal, chip/seal. And not the old, worn-down, smooth chip/seal of Texas backroads long forgotten by TxDOT. Oh no, it was bone-jarring, check-all-the-screws-on-your-bike-after-the-ride, someone-in-the-city-had-extra-money-to-spend-so-they-redid-the-roads-every-six-months kind of chip/seal. Let’s just say that if you could position yourself on the seat just right you might be able to give yourself a little O. That’s one way to get the miles to fly by! If that had happened I might have been a little more forgiving for the awful roads. Instead I was left with itchy arms and legs from the vibration. Not nearly as pleasant a sensation.

Then there was the traffic. Roadkill really isn’t a good look for me, but the ride organizers seemed determined. We road on rural highways with cars zipping past us at 60 mph. At one time, a car passed me (thankfully not at 60 mph) with only about 8 inches to spare. That was a little tense. Just a little. After that we road on the access road. Oh joy.

The traffic and the roads were such and shame, because it was a great ride. The hills were perfect, the weather was perfect, the distance was perfect, and, honestly, the rest of the rally was perfect. We were greeted by the fabulous music when we returned 2 miles short of the promised 40 miles. Hey what a nice surprise to think you have 2 more miles to go, but instead there’s the finish line and people are trying to give you free hotdogs. What’s not to love about that?!?! I love finishing early! I love hotdogs!! And I definitely love FREE!!!!

While we were hanging out in the parking lot, drinking our post-ride beers, and eating our free hotdogs, we met Ginny, the Speedy Midget. Okay, maybe not really a midget, but I’m guessing she was less than 4’8”. (Baad Kitty would look like an Amazon next to her.) And she was hanging with the BIG BOYS. She flew past us on the ride and she was riding the 100k!! She was in the middle of a pack of men that were racing. Needless to say she won the prize for the first woman to finish the 100k. Apparently she’s a professional road and mountain bike racer. It was really quite fascinating.

(Jen, Donna, GingerClip, and Dawn)

Well there you have it. Not a very funny or exhilarating ride review. But them’s the facts, ma’am. Obviously I won’t be riding this again next year.

Next week: The Cotton Patch Classic

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